Olives and Baroni

“The party,” I said, “is Saturday. Why are you cooking on Thursday?”

“Timely and early preparation, Dan,” Nazy replied.

“Did Nazy say ‘early’,” I thought. “Early?” I said. “ A new word in your vocabulary?”

“Borani tastes better if it’s prepared beforehand.”

“So you’re not actually getting ready ‘early’. Right?”

“I’ve also prepared the dessert, which needs to be kept frozen.”

“The freezer is too small. And, did you say: ‘early’,” I asked – again.

“You can carry the dessert to the terrace; it’s cold outside and it will stay frozen.”

“And that’s because we want to be ready – early?” I asked.

“It will be cold inside, Dan, if you don’t drop that word.”

Borani is a mixture of yoghurt and spinach with a bit of saffron water and other exotic ingredients. The spinach is cooked before being mixed.

Aside: Although Borani is a Persian Delicacy, in my opinion, cooked spinach tastes like grass soaked in gasoline. This is not a thought that I routinely share with my spouse.

The mixture was expertly prepared and set aside to cool. Unfortunately, it was set aside to cool on a glass top stove which wasn’t completely turned off. Fortunately, I was not the one who left the stove burner (left front) on the ‘2’ setting. Unfortunately, I failed to access my well-honed husband skills before opening my mouth.

“It’s not easy to screw up the cooling down portion of a recipe.” I noted.

Nazy, glaring at me, opened a cabinet door and a jar of olives plummeted to the floor. It was a glass jar of olives and a tile floor. Glass shards, olive oil and whole olives were ejected from ground zero into the surrounding environs.

“So much for early,” I said as I grabbed a roll of paper towels and began cleaning up.

It was one 'early' too many.