Note: Blog entries about corporate life should not be read as complaints about my own employer, the customer that I deal with or specific individuals. They merely represent commentary that may be at odds with best corporate practice
Unexpectedly the Norway-based customer had made a reasonable request. They wanted a single global price for all of the project’s computers; they also wanted delivery anywhere in the world. Our multi (not inter) national company found this very hard to do. Each of the operating units was country based and each had different standard terms, conditions and prices. (And, most importantly, each country wanted to make sure that ‘they’ got full credit for the sale of hardware in their country.)
I had, I thought, designed a clever solution. We had a local Norwegian distributor, Telenor, purchase all the computers. Then Telenor would ship the machines to the various local sites. The first four computers were purportedly going to London. It had taken a long time to get intracompany agreement and now, the computers had been shipped, but weren’t working. I called our project engineer in the UK for an update.
“They’re still not working? Still?” Naturally I was patience and understanding.
“Not yet, Dan.”
“What happened?”
“It’s a long story.”
“Enlighten me.”
“The computers were assembled in our plant in Scotland.”
“Yes.”
“Then they were shipped to Norway. I think that was your idea, right?”
“Editorial commentary is not necessary,” I replied.
“Telenor repackaged the machines and air shipped them to London. When they arrived, the customs agents were confused: computers manufactured on Monday in Scotland were being flown into London from Norway on Wednesday. A hold was placed on the order.”
“A hold?”
“Yes. But we worked that out. I arranged for a lorry…”
“A lorry?”
“It’s a truck, Dan. The trucking company picked up the computers on Friday..”
“Which Friday?”
“That was two weeks ago.”
“Two weeks ago, but..”
“The lorry was too wide to fit in the alley by the customer’s building. So, they took the computers back to Heathrow.”
“I see.”
“Heathrow isn’t used to handling freight that isn’t going somewhere. Our shipment got lost.”
“Lost?”
“Yes, we worked that out last week. I organized a small truck..”
“A van?”
“Precisely. The van driver loaded the computers and then telephoned. He wouldn’t deliver the equipment until he got paid ₤58 and 43 pence.”
“What?”
“In cash. It seems that the last time we did this, it took him six months to get paid. So I drove to Heathrow, got money from the ATM and paid him. You will, I hope, approve the expense report.”
“Yes, of course. When did this happen?”
“Today.”
“So the computers have arrived?”
“Not exactly. With all the delays, the crew I hired to unload the computers had gone home by the time the van arrived in Central London. Luckily, the customer was willing to help unload the machines and carry them into the computer room.”
“Finally, some good news.”
“Yes, but it was raining and we dropped one of them down a stairwell.”
“Down a stairwell?”
“Only one of them. By some miracle, the racks for the units had arrived by land shipment, so we were ready to install the machines.”
“Finally, good news. So, three machines are working…”
“Not quite. In addition to repacking the computers, Telenor replaced the British power cables with Norwegian cables. We can’t…”
Showing posts with label working conditions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label working conditions. Show all posts
Monday, March 16, 2009
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
The Flexible Office
Note: Blog entries about corporate life should not be read as complaints about my own employer, the customer that I deal with or specific individuals. They merely represent commentary that may be at odds with best corporate practice.
Following an exceptionally uneventful flight home, I rested for six (whole) hours before heading to headquarters to catch up. I was somewhat surprised to see someone sitting in my office, eh, sitting at my desk. I calmly walked to HR.
“So,” I asked. “Where have you moved me?”
“We have established a flex-desk concept, Dan.”
“Flex desk? What’s that mean?”
“Most of our headquarters staff spends most of their time traveling. Financial analysis indicates an opportunity for massive savings by eliminating fixed desks. If you come to the office, simply choose any available desk.”
“There are no available desks,” I replied.
“Perhaps you shouldn’t be in the office, Dan. You should be traveling or visiting customers. You could work at home. You should really be at the customer's site.”
“I understand. But this is a holiday week. My customer’s office is closed. So what do I do now?”
“You can work in the cafeteria – just push the holiday decorations out of the way.”
“But..”
“And, Dan, I’ve got this package for you from HR.”
“A package? From HR? Is this one of those extremely generous severance packages?”
“Of course not, Dan. You are…”
“So how do I get one of those packages?”
“The proven route is incompetence.”
“But - how will I stand out in the crowd?”
“Dan! You’re cute.”
I picked up my briefcase and walked to the cafeteria to open the package from HR. As I opened it, a plague, eh, plaque, framed in plastic, popped open. The plaque, ‘suitable for display in your office’, celebrated 10 years with the company. There was a small yellow sticky note with instructions to telephone a number allowing me to choose an appropriate gift. (Parenthetically, the note also reminded me to use the land line, not a mobile phone, in order to limit expenses.) I dialed the number and was greeted by an ‘Intelligent Voice Response’ system:
“Welcome, valued employee of Mega Corporation. Congratulations on your 10 years of service. If you would like a digital clock please press 1 if you would like a….”
Question: You clearly don’t like the hotel concept of office space. Surely you understand and support the fact that companies must control costs.
Answer: Indeed. It might, however, be wise to have enough ‘flexible’ space to handle the workload. Companies may also discover that forcing people to work from home leads to a loss of social cohesion. (People like to see their colleagues.) There might be less resistance if companies didn’t degrade working conditions (and fringe benefits) at the same time they’re saying “people are our most important asset” or “we will be global thought-leaders”. It’s hard to see the connection between being a thought leader whilst providing industry-average (i.e. mediocre) working conditions.
Following an exceptionally uneventful flight home, I rested for six (whole) hours before heading to headquarters to catch up. I was somewhat surprised to see someone sitting in my office, eh, sitting at my desk. I calmly walked to HR.
“So,” I asked. “Where have you moved me?”
“We have established a flex-desk concept, Dan.”
“Flex desk? What’s that mean?”
“Most of our headquarters staff spends most of their time traveling. Financial analysis indicates an opportunity for massive savings by eliminating fixed desks. If you come to the office, simply choose any available desk.”
“There are no available desks,” I replied.
“Perhaps you shouldn’t be in the office, Dan. You should be traveling or visiting customers. You could work at home. You should really be at the customer's site.”
“I understand. But this is a holiday week. My customer’s office is closed. So what do I do now?”
“You can work in the cafeteria – just push the holiday decorations out of the way.”
“But..”
“And, Dan, I’ve got this package for you from HR.”
“A package? From HR? Is this one of those extremely generous severance packages?”
“Of course not, Dan. You are…”
“So how do I get one of those packages?”
“The proven route is incompetence.”
“But - how will I stand out in the crowd?”
“Dan! You’re cute.”
I picked up my briefcase and walked to the cafeteria to open the package from HR. As I opened it, a plague, eh, plaque, framed in plastic, popped open. The plaque, ‘suitable for display in your office’, celebrated 10 years with the company. There was a small yellow sticky note with instructions to telephone a number allowing me to choose an appropriate gift. (Parenthetically, the note also reminded me to use the land line, not a mobile phone, in order to limit expenses.) I dialed the number and was greeted by an ‘Intelligent Voice Response’ system:
“Welcome, valued employee of Mega Corporation. Congratulations on your 10 years of service. If you would like a digital clock please press 1 if you would like a….”
Question: You clearly don’t like the hotel concept of office space. Surely you understand and support the fact that companies must control costs.
Answer: Indeed. It might, however, be wise to have enough ‘flexible’ space to handle the workload. Companies may also discover that forcing people to work from home leads to a loss of social cohesion. (People like to see their colleagues.) There might be less resistance if companies didn’t degrade working conditions (and fringe benefits) at the same time they’re saying “people are our most important asset” or “we will be global thought-leaders”. It’s hard to see the connection between being a thought leader whilst providing industry-average (i.e. mediocre) working conditions.
Question: Does the photograph at the top of this entry have anything to do with the content.
Answer: Guess.
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