A previous posting explained corporate “decisioning” as an inevitable outcome of Einstein’s Theory of Relativity: the sheer mass of people at corporate headquarters slows things down.
Further reflection shows that unintended consequences of the process generate collateral damage. Staff members circle around the center (the executive suite) at ever increasing velocity. We have already explained that as speed increases, time slows down (viewed from the outside.) The circling staff is analogous to the accretion disk around a black hole; the executive suite represents the singularity.
However, since we are talking about headquarters of a large organization, there is, of course, no accretion disk. (It’s an excretion disk.) As individuals in the disk approach the singularity, they are ripped apart by the gargantuan gravity at the center. In a black hole, dangerous gamma rays are ejected perpendicular to the plane of the accretion disk. In a large organization, dangerous management edicts are ejected perpendicular to the business problem. In both cases, anyone (or anything) inadvertently hit by ray or edict will be instantly incinerated. Note, finally, that the direction of the edict ejection precludes any damage to circle staff in headquarters. Overhead is safely immune to the dangerous edicts.
Further reflection shows that unintended consequences of the process generate collateral damage. Staff members circle around the center (the executive suite) at ever increasing velocity. We have already explained that as speed increases, time slows down (viewed from the outside.) The circling staff is analogous to the accretion disk around a black hole; the executive suite represents the singularity.
However, since we are talking about headquarters of a large organization, there is, of course, no accretion disk. (It’s an excretion disk.) As individuals in the disk approach the singularity, they are ripped apart by the gargantuan gravity at the center. In a black hole, dangerous gamma rays are ejected perpendicular to the plane of the accretion disk. In a large organization, dangerous management edicts are ejected perpendicular to the business problem. In both cases, anyone (or anything) inadvertently hit by ray or edict will be instantly incinerated. Note, finally, that the direction of the edict ejection precludes any damage to circle staff in headquarters. Overhead is safely immune to the dangerous edicts.
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