Taxes

The week began on a frightening note. Following routine, I collected the mail form our postbox. Anxiously I opened one (rather hefty) envelope as I took the elevator to our apartment. A piercing pain gripped my body and I slid to the floor wailing. My final USA tax assessment had arrived.

While Nazy reassured the neighbors, I crawled to the medicine cabinet and quaffed several (extra strength) pain killers. After I regained my strength (a process that took several hours, eh, days) I telephoned Caspar, my US accountant.

"It’s unfair, Caspar.” I explained, patiently.

“It is the law. As an American, you are not allowed to take advantage of the fact that you live in a low-tax country. You have to pay the difference.”

“Caspar!” I exclaimed. “My income went down. How can my taxes go up?”

“The dollar, Dan, went down, so your total income in US dollars increa$ed. A lot!”

“The dollar may have collapsed, but I am paid in Swiss Francs. My expenses are in Francs. The change in the dollar does not affect my cost of living in Switzerland.”

“You won’t need as many Francs to pay your American taxes..”

Spousal Interrupt: “Do not use this blog to complain about American taxes, Dan. The reader doesn’t care and is tired of hearing about this from you.”

... Now I have to think of a new topic....

P.S. The photo is of me scouting out a place to pitch a family tent in the forest. That's about the only place we will be able to afford if the taxes... oops, my wife is striding into view....